by Alan Rogers
Alan is a projekt producer based in sunny London
There is a painting in the New York Metropolitan Museum of Arts called ’Thérèse Dreaming’ by French artist; Balthus (https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/489977). It is of a 12 or 13 year old model in repose, lost in thought. The picture is considered scandalous due to the suggested eroticism suggested by the revealing pose of the child and the cat (symbolising sensuality) lapping milk on the floor of the studio.
The painting is itself the subject of several projects by Maya Hawke; daughter of Ethan Hawke and Uma Thurman. She is an actress (Most famously ‘Robin’ in ‘Stranger Things’), and a singer songwriter. Her work is soft, lyrical and thoughtful. I very much like her style (though I confess to being obsessively listening to Maggie Rogers’ Surrender album lately).
The first project (from Maya) is for a single released between her first and second albums, entitled ‘Blue Hippo’. The song itself is well written, but it is the video that accompanies it that has Maya portray herself as Thérèse, locked in the painting and calling for a boy to join her. She acknowledges that she has reached puberty (unlike the original Thérèse) by a small red stain on the crotch of her milk white knickers. The undertone of the video is that Thérèse is a 1930’s camgirl.
The second project is from her (currently unreleased) second album. Here she has released a song called ‘Thérèse’ where she describes the painting. Weirdly the video (which is x rated due to nudity and sexual content) feels like it belongs to the song ‘Blue Hippo’; Like the videos for each song have been swapped or are related. But clearly Maya is singing the lyrics to the relative song in both videos. It is a juxtaposition that I like. You know how I love when artists meld art genre’s in their work. It is why I love your art. It is why I love all intelligent art.
SOMEWHERE ON PLANET EARTH | 2011
THIS IS THE FIRST OF A THREE PART SERIES
EXAMINING PORNOGRAPHY’S CAMGIRL INDUSTRY
AND THE EFFECT THAT INDUSTRY HAD ON MY LIFE
IN EVERY CITY, THERE ARE CAMGIRLS STREAMING
AND THEY ARE HOW I GOT MY START
IN EROTIC FILM MAKING
The beginning of this film implies with words and sounds that your past vocations include being a cam girl. Though, having watched enough of these films, this implication is malleable.
Note the change to ‘alien’. You are not related to an alien, unless we all are.
We all just want to be free
NOVELIST WILLIAM BORROUGHS WROTE
WHETHER YOU SNIFF IT OR SMOKE IT
EAT IT OR WATCH IT
OR STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE
THE RESULT IS THE SAME
AN UNHEALTHY ADDICTION TO SOMETHING
This has made me wonder whether you are channelling the plot line to Naked Lunch here. There is (if I remember rightly) a voyeuristic element to the insect orgies in the second act. The visuals though imply that drugs are also considered.
THE PORNOGRAPHY INDUSTRY’S REAL FEAR IS
THAT SOMEONE MAY COME ALONG
AND UNDERSTAND SEXUAL PERVERSION BETTER THAN THEY DO
AND THEREFORE BY DEFAULT
LEAD THEM TO EXCLUSION THROUGH IGNORANCE
Sex sells. Pornography is (to me) the natural extension of that adage. I would argue that the cam girl element is( simply) a spin-off simply due to the technology developments of video chat. It appears that if there is a way to exploit new technology in a sexual way, someone in the porn industry will do it.
Interactive porn is the dream; but porn sells better when it can be consumed in a personal and private way. It is a thing most people want to indulge in secretly, consuming porn is not something most people discuss with their friends and family. In this way, the cam girl porn is risky. There is the possibility of recognition through your words or interactions. For years now, those who produce porn have been trying to work out ways for the consumer to have some control over the content, whilst not having to personally ‘interact’ with a real human.
Camgirls short circuit the ‘interactive’ route by going straight to a one to one personal interaction. By this I mean the situation where the actor (normally female) would set up a camera to point at them then read messages from consumers in a private chat room describing what they want the actor to do. The camera does not capture the many and varied genitalia being manipulated, but concentrates on the actors ability to arouse their audience.
In a way, the cam girl porn is risky. There is the possibility of recognition through your words or interactions. The payoff is the interactive element. To me the term ‘cam-whore’ is accurately observed, as it feels like a bridge between porn created as a consumable item (film, book, picture, etc.) and good old fashioned prostitution.
TRUTHFUL EROTICA IS THE POISON THEY FEAR
BECAUSE PORN IS THE FALLEN ANGEL OF THE ANTEDILUVIAN EPOCH
THIS IS A FILM ABOUT THE EFFECT OF SOMATIC FREQUENCIES ON ALIEN MATTER
Is it? I agree that it is a story. ‘Look into my eyes. Not around the eyes. Look INTO my eyes’.
ACT 1: CAMGIRL SEX
DON’T FALL VICTIM TO FAIRY TALES – LIBER DIONYSUS
IN GRECO-ROMAN RELIGION, LIBER DIONYSUS IS THE NATURE GOD OF FRUITFULNESS, WINE AND ECSTASY
Sounds like a fun guy.
BEING A CAM GIRL
IS AN ENDLESS LOOP OF WAKING INTO A FANTASY
IF ONE PERSON CAN MAKE ANOTHER PERSON
FORGET ALL THE PAIN AND DARKNESS
SHOULD THEY FEEL ASHAMED OF IT?
Good point, well made. The fact that a lot of sex is benevolent is a point missed by some. It is good at times to remind people that sex should not be considered selfish and shameful. With regards to selfishness, the monetary gain through sex is a factor of supply and demand, although exploitation of others to achieve this should also be considered. With regards to shamefulness, the deed is normally only shameful if it is hidden because it embarrasses you, and is suddenly public knowledge.
WATCHING CAMGIRLS INTERACT WITH THEIR CUSTOMERS
EFFECTED MY SEX
MAKING IT SAVAGE AND RAPACIOUS
I WASN’T CONTENT TO WATCH
I WANTED IT INSIDE ME
The effect of this portion of the film is one of intense sexual melodrama. These words and the words to come, are effective in painting that erotic canvas. The video is of an intensely personal nature and throws open the aspect of shame and shamefulness. I can only conclude that this video does not in any way embarrass you. Nor should it. It is quite beautiful.
TO CRAWL INTO THE MARROW OF SEXUAL DESIRE
TO CARESS EACH VEIN
UNTIL THE CELLS WERE ALL MIXED UP
NO SECRETS OR SHADOWS SLIDING BETWEEN US
ONLY AN ENDLESS DEVOURING OF EACH OTHER
There is a plane of existence that is experienced only in the erotic moment, that you describe very nicely here.
IT WAS AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP
IT HURT LIKE HELL BUT I DIDN’T WANT IT TO STOP
BECAUSE AT LEAST PAIN IS A FEELING
PAIN REMINDS YOU YOU’RE STILL ALIVE
HATE IS WHEN YOU LOVE SOMETHING
THAT YOU KNOW YOU SHOULDN’T
THIS IS MORE OF HOW I REMEMBER THESE DAYS
Interesting. Pain is an element to sex that is often ignored too. Both partners will experience pain during sex at some point. It is not normal, but it sometimes happens. Things get sore quickly if not lubricated enough, and skin can only stretch so far. However desire, lust and overall instinct will normally compel us to carry on through the pain.
CAMGIRLS ARE MY MEMORIES. OF ME. AND OTHERS
I HAD BECOME A CAM-WHORE
NOTHING LESS, NOTHING MORE
COMING SEVEN HOURS A DAY
WAS TAKING TIME AWAY FROM OTHER THINGS
THE WORLD OF CAMGIRLS IS SO THICK WITH GHOSTS
ITS A WONDER ANYONE CAN BREATHE
This is where the lines get blurred intentionally. I don’t know if you ever worked as a cam girl. I suspect you have not, but I am not judgemental so fair enough if you have.
The words though could be interpreted as saying that you lived a cam girl like experience, where your partner used to film you carrying out various sexual acts for both your enjoyment. The output of which is becoming the basis for this series of films.
A BETTER DEFINITION OF CAM SEX IS
MUTUAL BENEVOLENT INSANITY
IF YOU TELL A STORY ENOUGH TIMES
IT SOUNDS LIKE FICTION
YOU DON’T FEEL THAT VISCERAL THROB OF RESONANCE
WITH THE PERSON WHO IS YOU
WHO DID THE THINGS YOU DID
I guess that looking back on that period of your life does seem like a dream to you now, even though you have video evidence that it happened. Perhaps you see yourself in the third person?
SOMETIMES PEOPLE SET THEMSELVES UP
TO BE HURT BY A SITUATION
INSTEAD OF HURTING THEMSELVES DIRECTLY
TO ABSOLVE THE BLAME
WHAT A STRANGE WORLD
WHERE PEOPLE PAY PEOPLE TO LISTEN TO THEIR PROBLEMS
PAY THEM TO FUCK THEMSELVES WHILE WE WATCH
AND PAY THEM TO SAVE US
Every act has a consequence. The element of control is never a binary equation. There are abusive relationships, without a doubt, where sexual control of another person is taken to the extreme, to the point where they are made to carry out sexual acts that they have no desire to. Then there are normal relationships where control is given up in exactly the same way with exactly the same acts, but the headspace is entirely different and the person wants to be made to carry out acts that they do not want to. The scale between the two scenarios is a grey area and hard to justify. But it is real.
So how do you protect those who do not want to be controlled from being exploited into the first scenario? Well BDSM experts (of which I am not) will tell you that it is all about communication. That knowing exactly how each other feel about a situation is essential and should be given freely as part of the sexual experience. That is where ‘safe words’ and ‘safe gestures’ are employed. And the first rule of BDSM is that the person in the role of ‘master/mistress’ should pay strict attention to these, and act appropriately and lovingly if called upon.
But you touch on the transactional element of porn here. How much we are willing to pay to absolve ourselves of this want.
ACT 2: THE NON-DISAPPEARANCE
APPEALS TO AUTHORITY CAN NEVER FREE ANYONE
IT IS FAR BETTER TO BE FREE
BY LEAVING THE FORTS AND BARRICADES OF FEAR
TO STAND ERECT AND FACE THE FUTURE
BY DRIFTING WITH THE TIDE OF TIME TOWARDS 250 FILMS
AND BEING WITH THE BLIND FORCE OF THE WORLD
TO THINK AND DREAM SEXUALLY BEYOND THIS WORLD
FORGETTING THE LIMITING CHAINS OF THIS SMALL PLANET
I like this as a complete phrase. The term ‘drifting with the tide of time’ is sublime.
I think what you are trying to say here is that we all have a duty to be free with our thoughts. That shame is not something we should experience when discussing sexual desire or thoughts.
That societal obligations restrict our actions only due to rules put in place to control the populous into behaving in a way that was ‘invented’ by others. And that all rules should be questioned.
The vocals over this explain manipulation and the act of resilience to counteract it.
ACT 3: THE ALIEN SEX OF ROSICRUCIANISM
ROSICRUCIANISM IS A SECRET ORDER OF MYSTICS
IT WAS A CULT FORMED IN LATE 1888 IN GERMANY
A CENTRAL DOCTRINE OF ROSICRUCIANISM
IS THE WORSHIP OF THE ‘NEPHILIM’
I like the fact that your films often feature cults. This one is obscure, to say the least. The Rosicrucianists were a product of fanaticism (in my opinion). Still plenty of those around. The nephilim sounds like a narrative prop.
THE NEPHALIM ARE A GROUP OF MYSTERIOUS ANCIENT BEINGS
WHO POSSESS UNUSUAL SIZE AND INNER STRENGTH
IN HEBREW, NEPHILIM IS TRANSLATED AS ‘THE FALLEN ONES’
IT IS BELIEVED THESE ‘FALLEN ONES’ WERE ORIGINALLY ANGELS
WHO STRAYED FROM RIGHTEOUSNESS INTO LUCIFERIAN SEX ACTS
When I was growing up, everyone had a copy of ‘Chariots of the Gods’ by Erich Von Däniken on their shelves. I remember reading it as a teenager and being totally bought into the idea that we developed as humans only because of alien technology.
THE NEPHALIM HAVE A VERY UNIQUE PLACE IN THEOLOGY
THEY WERE THE ONLY DEMONS
WHO WERE ABLE TO MATE WITH HUMAN WOMEN
THE FEMALE OFFSPRING OF THIS MATING
WERE KNOWN IN THE BIBLE AS
‘THE UNGODLY WOMEN FROM THE BLOODLINE OF CAIN’
The bible. The book that was written by monks in interpretation of stories that were told over centuries after the death of Christ, and translated and interpreted from ancient texts that were ambiguous to start with and end up positively fictional in their interpretations. Unless someone invents a time machine (presumably one that can not travel back to our age because otherwise we would know about it) and travel back to Palestine 2000 years ago, and see for themselves what went down. Then the whole thing should be taken only as weirdly worded guidance towards societal roles (and most of them are actually damaging to society) rather than fact in my opinion.
THERE IS A POPULAR VIEW IN BIBLICAL AUTHORITY
THAT THE NELPHIM WERE ACTUALLY SPACE ALIENS
AND THEY TOOK CONTROL OF UNGODLY MEN
AND CAUSED THEM TO BREED WITH UNGODLY HUMAN WOMEN
THIS PRODUCED A RACE OF ALIEN-LIKE EVIL HUMANS
Hmm. Quite Dänikeneque. I think he did have a hypothesis that went along the lines of interbreeding between aliens and homo-erectus producing the first homo-sapiens. Or something like that.
IT IS INTERESTING TO NOTE THAT ‘NELPHIM’ TRANSLATES AS
‘FALLEN ANGELS’ – OR BROADLY ‘BEINGS WHO FELL FROM THE SKY’
EXTRA-TERRESTIALS FROM THE HEAVENS WHO VISITED EARTH
IN 2 PETER 2:1-11, THE APOSTLE WROTE OF THESE VISITORS:
‘FALSE PROPHETS ARE AMONG US’
‘THEY ARE EVIL-DOERS WHO HAVE LEFT THEIR DOMAIN’
‘THEY ARE SECRETLY INTRODUCING DESTRUCTIVE HERESIES’
‘MANY WILL FOLLOW THEIR WORSHIP OF STRANGE FLESH’
‘AND BECAUSE OF THEM, THE TRUTH WILL BE MALIGNED’
‘THEY WILL EXPLOIT THE IGNORANT WITH FALSE WORDS’
‘ESPECIALLY THOSE WHO INDULGE IN CORRUPT DESIRES’
‘THE LORDS REVENGE ON THESE BEINGS’
‘SHALL BE ETERNAL DAMNATION IN THE FIRES OF HELL’
I hope this is a dig at the porn industry and not an attempt at a sermon. As I said before; Paul, Luke Matthew, the lot of them never wrote a thing. The gospels were interpretations of their stories, written many years after they died. This is the fact that the church do not want you to think much about. The word of god is at best a good guess.
ACT 4: THE BURDEN OF BEING ADEPT
SOMETIMES CARRYING THE BURDEN OF A SECRET TRUTH
IS ACTUALLY A GIFT YOU GIVE TO SOMEONE ELSE
YOU FEAR THE BURDEN OF THAT KNOWLEDGE SO THEY DON’T HAVE TO
BECAUSE TELLING THEM WOULD CHANGE NOTHING
EITHER YOU BELIEVE THE PORN INDUSTRY IS RUN BY ALIENS
OR YOU DON’T
I don’t. However I do believe the porn industry is run by greed, exploitation and consumerism. It is a capitalist product that exploits the lustful instincts inherent in all of us.
YOU MUST SUFFER ME, AND THEN GO YOUR OWN WAY – ROBERT LOUIS STEVENSON | DR. JEKYLL AND MR. HYDE
Interesting choice of quote. Is this a set up for the next film?
There is a dazzling truth to your films. I know that there are many abstract elements that scatter the truth like a virtual mirror-ball. But I feel that the honesty of a bared soul shines through, even when the the narrative is unclear.
The music was essential to the mood of this piece. The middle section where you let the music play with virtual no overwork other than a short paraphrase registering that music is everything. This worked well. The commentary about mysticism and adeptness was interesting but did not fully engage me to be honest. You know for me it is about the written word. The words you write. They mean more to me.
I very much enjoyed this video, and look forward to the next installment.
Best Wishes, and all the best,