WHAT’S IN THE BOX

In the video, you take off your shorts.

Rude.

What problem? You perceive you have a problem, when clearly the person who asked you to pleasure yourself in front of him is the bigger pervert.

I hope you washed your hands.

Implying that this happened again.

So is this a thing? I have not heard of this. You meet someone at a cafe and polish the pearl for their pleasure? I assume his needs were taken care of? Else this is just an erotic show for him that will leave him wanting to bust a nut somewhere. Sorry to be so crude.

Perhaps I have missed the point then.

It seems quite plausible. 

I have always thought these films were a semi-autobiographical account of a woman with a high libido, making beautiful essays that provoke and stimulate  the viewers consience by describing a journey into the dark places of the soul. 

But to confess some of the darkest secrets must be cathartic; I may have even used that word once or twice before when describing your words.

We all masturbate. At least I hope we do. I feel sorry for those who don’t. They are missing out on one of life’s small compensations.

But we mainly do it in privacy. To do so in public would be debauchery in most minds I guess. 

Why the dollar signs? Does that signify you were being paid to wank in public?

Let’s see. A Lovesense vibrator?  Ben-Wa balls?

2.15 PM 1st January 2013

Yep seven years ago.

I wonder when I jumped on board? Must have been shortly after I guess. I can’t remember. I wish I had those emails still.

Is this you talking or the Google Executive?

Good question. But if you can understand the question you already know the answer.

That does sound crazy when you put it like that.

No but you may get turned on with humiliation, and that sexual urge could make you do things that sound crazy.

Anecdote time: I was told a (unsubstantiated) story in my youth (by someone who claimed to have been there) of a beautiful actress who got involved with a gangster from the West End of London. She came into the pub where he (and the story teller) was drinking asking him to come home. The pub almost stopped to watch as she was famous and instantly recognisable.  He told her to beg on her knees. And while she was knelt before him, he whipped his cock out and pissed in her face. Apparently she took it without shame, and they left together.

True or not; I don’t know. But it makes a good story. And like your films it was told to me as truth.

But taken out of context it sounds crazy.

Everybody questions themselves sometimes. Including their sanity.

Did your mother make you do what?

Drugs can make you do lots of doubtful things.

This is an interesting cultural reference, that I do not get. Witness? Where she was raped?

Blame it on my ADHD?

How prophetic. If said back in 2013.

I can’t claim to have seen this film. Sorry.

‘Hey, buster, the face is up here’

Hmm. Again, not quite grasping something here. Perhaps I need to watch the film.

Not true. You cannot create art if your moral compass is broken (In my opinion).

We live for the now. The pleasure in watching the sunset. In feeling baked Alaska drip down your throat,  In winning at anything. And of course lots of orgasms.

OR 

Vegan? 

Indeed.

Let’s do better than that. Let’s put things straight.

Another odd statement that I am confused by. I assume there is a twinge of revenge in there somewhere.

The world is a fucked up place and we seem to be living through strange times. Your films are beautiful escapism in the form of libertarian sexuality described in poetry accompanied by an amazing soundtrack over shots of a beautiful naked body.

I am humbled to be a part of your club. It is right to question everything. Shine on you crazy diamond.

Please take care and live well.

Alan