Transcription by Bernie Glynn. Word up homeboy.
Ctrl Alt Del Me
A letter written on my shroud of shame.
Excerpts from a letter from my parents received two weeks ago. I was finishing the last video 'showerlust' at the time.
The life you are dedicating yourself to is not just different from ours, it is the opposite. Opposite to our morality, our values, and our life's work. We operate on very different moral compasses, which helps us understand why there is such tension between us.
You are so angry at us for what we have done to you, whatever that is.
Now is the time to act in adult ways and leave the past behind, which cannot be changed and take responsibility for the consequences of all your actions and for yourself. Everyone’s childhood is full of challenges to be overcome or not. There is no need to transfer your anger. We can no longer be the people who are blamed and be seen to have such a devastating effect on our daughter.
Your assumptions about our intentions are bordering on L U D I C R O U S.
Have you ever wondered what is behind all these *petty* accusations?
Lately we are found to be at fault for whatever we do. We can't tolerate such behaviour anymore.
You say in your letters to that you are not meaning to hurt us that you are just being honest about your truth but your truth is something you have projected onto us.
Asking us to approve of something that has opposite values to ours is an impossible and improper request. After realising this, the hopes for a happy family are impossible because we are the subject of scrutiny by you as to whether we measure up to your expectations. We do not have the time or energy to build bridges, we have realised it is futile. We live our lives by a code of respect; you should too.
We can only state that we are prepared to change if the situation changes. Therefore we feel like we have no choice but to wish you well in the hope that you succeed in whatever you have to do.
We will always love you.
I will never forget the things that they said, not because they mattered, but because they made me feel like I did. They made me doubt whether all this self-discovery was worth it.
I can’t blame them. They have no idea who I am. They don't know me now. They didn't know me then. The only me they know is the 12 year old Me. And I've done a lot of weird shit since then.
Must be pretty confusing for them. It is for me. And the thin line between right & wrong is blurring fast. But if nothing changes, then nothing will change.
"Sometimes, love is not enough and the road gets tough. I don't know why"
Welcome to my world. It is a slut of a place.
Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.