3bdbb80eecbdc0055b9e9394306eb617.jpg

Welcome to my world. It's a slut of a place. 

You will notice that I use the word 'slut' as a description of myself in my videos.

This has been controversial and requires some explanation.

I do not want to create false expectations amongst men, or create antagonism amongst women.

I know the very powerful negative connotations of the word when it is used against women by men, and other women  -  and I have felt its sting many times throughout my life. 

So I want to explain how, why and in what context I use it. 


I was absolutely blown away by your and Max’s intelligent, innovative approach to sexuality and eroticism. It’s very refreshing, and much needed these days more than ever.
— Nigel Cundy

Firstly, I refuse to buy in to its appropriation by a patriarchal society as a way to condemn sexually liberated women.

Since this appropriation the word has been used to mean: a sexually promiscuous woman or a woman of a low or loose character.

These definitions identify a slut as a person of low character—a person who lacks the ability or chooses not to exercise a power of discernment to order their affairs. 

I never use the word slut in this way, or in the way the porn industry uses it.


You put yourself out there on such a different plain that I couldn’t help be mesmerized by you and your message
— Eric Rhodes

I use the word as it is defined in the book 'The Ethical Slut':

"a slut is a person of any gender who has the courage to lead their life according to the radical proposition that sex is nice, is a pleasure and is good for you." 

A slut is a person who has taken control of their sexuality regardless of religious or social pressures or conventions to conform to a straight-laced or 'normal' lifestyle.

I am taking the term back as a way to express my rejection of the concept that someone else, or a government, or society, or religion may pass judgement, or control your own sexuality, or how you think about sex. 

Not only am I taking back the word from men, I'm taking it back from women who use it as a weapon. Below is an e-mail received in the early days of this project.....

Slut.Still007.jpg

The last word on this topic goes to - Emily McCoombs writing at XOJANE:

"People called me a lot of things in high-school -- freak, dyke, lard-ass -- but I can't recall anyone ever calling me a slut.

12032_10152326589228502_357372168_n.jpg

Three-hundred pound National Merit Scholars were not sluts in the collective consciousness of the Oklahoma rednecks who daily tormented me.


Perhaps never having it hurled at me during my formative years contributes to its lack of barb for me now. In fact, I love the word SLUT.

Say it out loud right now: SLUT! Doesn't it have a nice ring to it? Like FUCK, it just sort of jumps off your tongue and into the world.

As with any reclaimed word, some people find it uncool when I use it to describe myself. But to me there's nothing negative about being a slut. Sluts are FUN! Sluts do whatever they want, whenever they want, and they don't regret anything. Sluts dive as voraciously into sex as they do their other many passions.

Sluts like their own bodies, and other people's too. Sluts are enthusiastic!"