Just watched Subculture and Membrane - you have real talent - I love the juxtaposition of the sound tracks and images.
I bought the Velvet Underground album when I was a mere 15 years old - still listen to it now I am 59 - but I have never been any good at art myself, I just enjoy consuming it.
You are beautiful Missy, every square inch of you.
Sorry about your grandma - there are those who are human and those who cannot cope with the reality of being human, so they repress it. We are unique among animals in being consumed by fear of ourselves and our bodies, despite the fact that we are all naked underneath.
All the best,