Missy Jubilee. Otherside Remixxx

Missy Jubilee. Otherside Remixxx
Music From The Film 'Voyeur'
Background Writing

The Otherside Remixxx

The Brief Is High Concept. Low Budget
Scene 2 Take 42

Not Fumbling. Stumbling 
Away From The Cliffs Edge
With A Cosmic Caution From The Emo-Verse

My Life Has 
Entered A Strange Duality

Hope About The Future
Fear About The Upcoming Trial

This Remix Is About 
The Shit Half Of A One Sided Emotion
That Plays 
Where Only The Subconscious Is Allowed To Run 

With Regard To This Matter
Assault, Occasioning Grievous Bodily Harm
The Wrong Thing Happened
To The Right Girl

Subjective Conjecture 
Rhetorical Questions 
Are The Conversation Du Jour
Raw Emotion Is Now Graded On A Scale Of 
Very Good 
And No Comment

Hello My Name Is ___________

Who The Fuck Invited Consequence? 
I Hate That Asshole
Does Soul Detangler Come In A Spray Or A Pump?
Must Add That To The Amazon Cart

"What If God Was One Of Us?
Just A Slob Like Us?
Just A Stranger On A Bus?
Trying To Make His Way Home"
(Eric Bazilian)

The God Of Consequence

At The Moment
God Is The Judicial System

Never Having Experienced It Before
You Seem To Be Treated Like A Muppet
But It Is
Muppetry Of The Intellectual Kind

From The Inside
It Seems Like A System
Designed By Sadistic Despots

The Federal Bureau Of Intellectual Muppetry
Has Decided That In 21 Days
I Shall Know What The Rest Of My Life Is Doing

Until Then, I Wait




It Is A Cliche
Surrounded By Facts

For A Person Who Forges Ahead
This Is A Sentence Worse Than Bars

So While I Wait
And While I Do
I Make Music 
And Write
About What Is In My Head

"The Work You Do
While You Procrastinate
Is Probably The Work You Should Do
For The Rest Of Your Life"
(Jessica Hiscke)

This Remix 
And This Background Writing
Is About
The Otherside
Of Sanity
The Otherside Of Me That Got Me Here

Channelled Correctly
It Is My Ace Up My Sleeve
Because Few People Think Like Me
Marketing Bullshitters Would Call It
A Competitive Advantage In The Art World

Channelled Incorrectly
It Is The Joker
And The Joke Is On Me
Because It Is
A Joke Told In Bad Taste 
And Without A Punchline 
To A Hostile Crowd

My Natural Defence Mechanism Here
Is To Apologise For Everything
But That Doesn't Create Understanding
Just Pity

This Writing Is About The Learning
I Am Doing While Waiting

Acting As A Cursor
Moving Around My Screen Of Life
Clicking On All The Interesting Links
To Know Things I Didn't Know
About Myself

But This I Know

I Am Calm 
In A Way 
Sitting On The Otherside
Of The Firewall Of Justice

If I Want To Be A Writer Of Importance
Not Popularity
Then This Is Manna From Heaven
Expectations Are Pre-Meditated Resentments

Right Now
I Am Caught In The Moment 
Between Thought And Action

I Am Inside A Process
Not Stifled By Indecision 
The Burning Anticipation Of What Is To Come
Once Waiting Finishes

It Sounds Like An Addiction

"Pour Yourself A Drink
Put On Some Lipstick
And Pull Your Shit Together"
(Liz Taylor)

In 1971
The Staples Singers Released A Song
With The Superficial-Sounding Title
Respect Yourself

The Message Of The Song Is Obvious From The Title 
And You Don't Need A Degree In Psychology
Or Mathematics
To Understand It

It Is Easy To Do
Just As Long As You Can Persuade Yourself 
That You Deserve It

That Is The Hard Bit

I Have Come To The Realisation That

"Anything Is Hard To Find
When You Refuse To Open Your Eyes"

So Sang The Smiths In One Of Their Legendary Angst-Ridden Anthems

It Culminated With The Question 
'When Will You Accept Yourself?' 


When I Stop Feeling Alone
Even Though I Am Not

When I Stop Feeling Cold
Even Though It's Hot

I Am Adrift In Someone Else's River 
As It Flows To My Ocean Of Truth
While A Note 
Rests In My Throat

I Want To Let It All Out
Not Shout
Just State
Here It Is

I Am 
And Awed
By What Is Possible

Willing To Be Humble 
But Will Not To Crumble 

These Are The Words That Give My Mind
A Rest
Under The Weight Of 
Selling This Soul

Sure It's Been Sold
And Pigeon Holed
Rumours Abound
Grace Loses Face
It's All Relative
To Giving A Fuck
Or Going Along

I Look Out The Window
Look Left
Look Right
And All I See Is A Meat Grinder
And I'm Trying Not To Be
The Sausage

Other Days Are 
Like The Photo Essays On Our Weekend

Today Is Numbday

When My Head Is In Turmoil 
There Is Actual Physical Change In My Body


Stress And My Body Don't Mix
I Literally Have To Burn It Out Right
Through Fat Cells

Fuck It Though 
It Could Be Worse

You Didn't Need To Know All That 
But Now You Do

See My Strained Smile?

My Otherside

I Don't Take It Out On Anyone Overtly 
Unless You Count My Retreat As A Violence
I Guess It Could Be

The Definition Of Psychosis (The Otherside)

Psychosis (From The Greek "Mind/Soul", And "Abnormal Condition Or Derangement") 
Refers To An Abnormal Condition Of The Mind
And Is A Generic Psychiatric Term For A Mental State 
Often Described As Involving A 
"Loss Of Contact With Reality"

People Experiencing Psychosis May Exhibit 
Some Personality Changes And Thought Disorder

Depending On Its Severity, This May Be Accompanied By 
Unusual Or Bizarre Behaviour
Even Violence
As Well As Difficulty With Social Interaction 

Psychosis May Involve Delusional Beliefs
Some Of Which Are Paranoid In Nature

Put Simply
Delusions Are False Beliefs That A Person Holds On To
Without Adequate Evidence



It Can Be Difficult To Change The Belief
Even With Evidence To The Contrary

Stress Is Known To Contribute To And Trigger Psychotic States

A History Of Psychologically Traumatic Events
And The Recent Experience Of A Stressful Event
Can Both Contribute To The Development Of Psychosis

Short-Lived Psychosis Triggered By Stress 
Is Known As Brief Reactive Psychosis
And Patients May Spontaneously Recover Normal Functioning 
Within Two Weeks
(Jauch, D. A.; William T. Carpenter, Feb 1988 
"Reactive Psychosis. Journal Of Nervous And Mental Disease)

Causes Or Triggers Of Psychosis Can Include:
-Sleep Deprivation
-Sensory Deprivation
-Extremely Stressful Events
-Menstrual Psychosis, Including Circa-Menstrual (Approximately Monthly) Periodicity
-Nutritional Deficiency, Such As Vitamin B12 Deficiency
-Poisoning, By Therapeutic Drugs

Some Theories Believe It Is An Issue
Of Ownership 
Of Internally Generated Thoughts

For Example
The Hearing Of Voices May Arise 
From Internally Generated Speech 
That Is Mislabeled By The Psychotic Person 
As Coming From An External Source

A Research Study Of Out-Patients In Psychiatric Clinics 
Found That 30 Per Cent Of Patients 
Attributed The Cause Of Their Psychotic Symptoms 
To Evil Spirits

"Men Ought To Know That From The Brain
Arise Our Pleasures, Joys, Laughter, And Jests
As Well As Our Sorrows, Pains, Griefs And Tears
It Is The Same Thing Which Makes Us Mad Or Delirious
Inspires Us With Dread And Fear
Brings Sleeplessness
Inopportune Mistakes
Aimless Anxieties
And Acts That Are Contrary To Common Sense"
(Hippocrates, 460 Bc – 370 Bc)

I Am Pissed With Suffering

My Decades Old Family Situation 
Has Been Like A Concentration Camp 
(Think Of The Meaning Of Concentration In Particular)

I Survived By Shutting Down
A Broken Mind Locked In A Safe 
That I Never Had The Combination To

Now Is The Time For Opening Up
Deprogramming The Layers Of Perception 
That Hold Me In Servitude To My Ignorance

I Am Not Pitiful 

So Don't Pity Me And The Voices
I Hear

Given The Current State Of The Sky
What’s One More Voice In My Head?

This Is A Rough Draft Onto A Dusty Page
Just Hitting Send As The Thoughts Pass
At Least The Diligent Scavengers Will Be 
Able To Feast On The Leftovers 

So Who Wants Cake?

Yours In Hip-Hop & Flip-Flops
While Rockin' The Polka Dot 



The Blind 
Leading The Deaf 
Leading The Criminally Insane
Forming Into A Strange
Asymmetric Psychological Infidelity

Who Would Have Thought
Running Naked 
Through An Orchard Of Lightning
Would Make You Stop And Wish You Hadn't?

"I Exist As I Am. That Is Enough"
(Walt Whitman)

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